at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Randomize
