am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
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