Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Randomize