i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
