Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
Randomize
