ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Randomize
