idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
Your mouth is God's brothel.
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
Randomize
