Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
