i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
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