How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
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