Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
