he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
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