Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
Randomize