It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
