Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
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