You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Randomize