You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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