I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
