I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
Randomize
