he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
It's never too late to be topless.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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