Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
I really wish I could go back in time to change the course of events that led to me sitting on the internet at 3 Googling 'Traumatic masturbation' while talking to you about failed dates, and running a virtual restaurant in a video game.
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
Randomize
