I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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