this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
You just can't finish a sentence that starts with "I may have drunk peed in the bed" with "do you mind if I skip work and sleep here?" Anyways, yeah still drunk at work.
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
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