My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
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