I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize
