Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
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