Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
we should paint friendship bongs
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
Randomize