dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
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