do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
They have beer where we have blood.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
Randomize
