Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize