Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
Randomize
