Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
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I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
Randomize