My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building.
Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
