I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Randomize
