Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize