Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
That was before I lit my hair on fire
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
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