Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
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