called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
Randomize
