He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
how could I be having a bad time, I have the three most important things in life: Goat cheese, Xanax, and Saved By the Bell Re-runs.
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
