I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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