Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
Randomize
