No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
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