plz talk dirty to me
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
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