i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
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