i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
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