just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
smell my finger.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
