I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Still dying that you shit outside
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
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