this boner is exhausting
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Randomize
