Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
my sisters under your porch take her home
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
