Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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