But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
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