i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
i now understand why vodka
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
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